That's a big pile of wood you've got there

Today one of the vets that teaches my anatomy and physiology class was talking about the stress that a lot of students experience at this time of year and how it's important to address any problems you may be having. He used the analogy of chopping a huge amount of wood. You have this massive pile of wood you have to chop and the axe your using is dull, someone comes by and suggests that you sharpen your axe to make the job easier and you reply, "I don't have time for that! I'm too busy, I have this huge pile of wood to chop!"

It makes a lot of sense when someone presents it to you like that, but I know how hard it can be to stop and sharpen the axe, even when it seems like your stopping the forward momentum you feel you have. When all we do is forge ahead in a daunting task without regard for how we get there (as long as I just get there!) we'll usually find that we're going to have to go back anyway and clean up the mess we made on the way. As I try to progress with my kung fu, I will try to keep my axe sharp and move forward with purpose and efficiency, rather than blindly hacking my way.

Internal kung fu

This week is all about applying my kung fu to the rest of my life. I have been reminding myself to breath in and out, to focus on what I'm doing, if I've made a mistake it's ok, I'm moving on and focusing on what is in front of me. I actually relaxed so much in between questions during a timed station to station exam I think I fell asleep for a second- granted it was monday morning, but still! Today in clinic I had a uncooperative dog in a wicked side mount... no seriously trying to throw off the guys in san shou prepared me more than I knew for animal restraint. This week has and will continue to be one of the most mentally challenging ones yet, I can hardly wait for midterms to be over! With 10 courses on my plate it's going to take awhile. I can't wait to get out of the books and onto the mats.

insert ominous music here

There is so much going through my head right now I'm having a hard time narrowing anything down to write about. Everything in time is referenced against this Saturday.... before grading and after grading. I feel a little like I'm trying to brace myself to get punched in the face... are you ever ready for that? Ok, all kidding aside I have worked hard this year but it always feels like I could use more time to make everything better. Have a good week everyone, see you on the other side (of Saturday!)

you never know

As a member of Silent River I've come to know a lot of people in our community, and I have caught myself a few times when I was driving or at the grocery store, tempted to act a certain way in retaliation to something- maybe getting cut off for example- and remembering that the driver of that car could be a parent of a student. How embarrassing would it be to flip someone the bird and then meet them in the parking lot 5 minutes later and introduce yourself as their child's instructor? The same thing goes for being just about anywhere- having coffee with a friend and someone overhears a rude comment or bad language maybe. It's made me very aware that people will always be around to hear what you have to say or see what you do. Whether we like it or not we are constantly being judged on what we say and do. You never know if it will come back to you. Today there was an incident at school where someone did something that has bit them in the behind. Most of me can't believe how stupid it was and the other tiny bit feels bad for this person because they'll probably never be able to show their face again, and we've all done our share of stupid things we wish we could take back. It was just a reminder to me to speak and act in a way that I can be proud of no matter who hears or sees me.