gearing up for the new year

I am very excited for the coming new year. I've been doing a bit of reading about repairing and maintaining exercises I can be doing as well as some nutrition and supplement info for my lifestyle. I am looking forward to being in better shape and back into a routine, but a new and improved routine. I have been training very lightly the last few weeks, I feel like I was reaching a breaking point and my body was telling me to slow down, dull aches were becoming sharp pains. I still feel engaged and I am constantly thinking of my training and what I need to do for UBBT 8. I started drawing this week, something I haven't done in years but I had always loved it. I think I will incorporate that into my goals.
New Years day will start off with the Silent River Kung Fu UBBT team doing 1000 push ups and 1000 sit ups each. I will be doing a modified version of push ups: rows with resistance, light weight presses and flys instead of traditional push ups. It's a great way to come together as a team first thing and of course it gives you a nice running start to your numbers. Have a great new year everyone. See you in 2011.

one bite at a time

I have been struggling with my goals for the new year and UBBT 8. The coming year scares me and I feel like hiding. I have decided to go for black belt in October and I feel so intimidated by it. I am trying to make my UBBT goals reflect the training I need to do to be ready by October but every time I sit down to write a plan I just hit a wall. I have this overwhelming feeling like there is too much to do. I have let the injuries pile up without taking care of any of them and consequently I feel that those are a huge hurdle to overcome as well. The sensible side of my brain knows I need to stop looking at the whole picture and break it down into manageable parts. Don't you love blogging? Just writing things down helps you come up with a good starting point.

The year in mini review

I find it hard to put into words what the UBBT has done for me. Every thing that was promised and more, I suppose. The last two years of my life have been full of huge personal growth. I really do feel that I am a different person than I was before I started this process. When I read my blog entry "what the UBBT has done for me" from last year, it was just how I feel again at the end of this year. I think that it is such a part of my everyday life I forget how great it's been for me. UBBT 8 will be my third go, and its going to be all about focusing my training and repairing my body. It has become such a useful tool for me to set goals and then follow through. See you all next week.

homestretch

Finals next week, and UBBT 7 is in it's last month. I feel spread thin right now, but finals will be over next week so I can focus fully on training, how nice that will be! I am really struggling with push ups now, I have very sharp pain in my wrists when they are bent. I'm sure everyone out there has their own bumps and bruises from the past year too. Well, its back to stoichiometry and the factor unit method... see you all next week.

Aunt Jan

My aunt Jan is a real living hero. I know our living heroes can't be relatives, but this will just be an extra entry. My aunt Jan is my dads older sister and the most positive, loving, accepting woman I've ever met. She is like Yoda to me, a real Zen master. There has been so much tragedy in her life, the loss of her sisters, father, son, and two husbands: one to cancer and another in a car accident, but remains upbeat and loving. My aunt Jan came out to Edmonton a year ago when my dad was in the hospital. She and my dads best friend Dennis fell in love and she moved here to be with him. It was really lovely the two of them. Dennis was a confirmed bachelor in his early 70's and my aunt Jan just getting on with life after the loss of my uncle Cecil when they found each other. In august Dennis was diagnosed with terminal cancer. They married in the hospital a couple of months ago. Dennis is at home now, with my aunt Jan there taking care of him. She has done this before, so she takes care of all his needs, including feeding him through a stomach tube, so he doesn't need a live in nurse. I don't mean this to be a really depressing story about my aunt, rather it is an inspiration to me. The two of them are the definition of a happy couple. They are enjoying the time they have together, doing everything they can with the time they have. My aunt Jan is one of the few people who can really live in the moment. I strive to be like her. She is an angel on earth if there is such a thing. She is loving and giving, but she has the strength of a lion when she needs it, as she often has. I strive to be like her, she really is a living hero.

POW!

We're coming up on the last month of UBBT 7, man did time fly by for me this year.
Last week Silent River had our annual sweatfest for money, otherwise known as pandamonium. It's a great excuse to get creative and get everyone sweating in new ways. One thing about this event is that there are always students who shine and really inspire you to try harder. I had the chance to help out in the adult beginner class the night they did their Pandamonium. It was set up as a circuit with stations and we rotated after a certain amount of time. I just stayed at the pushups and situps station and did them all class, great catch up for me. What impressed me the most is the students who have the hardest time doing this stuff, but put more into it than a lot of advanced students. It's the people who have passion for what they're doing and aren't afraid to struggle that always inspire others the most. I hope I never stop trying things because I think someone else might think I look stupid. I hope I always remember that my struggles might inspire someone else, just as others do to me. UBBT is supposed to be a struggle, it's the ULTIMATE BLACK BELT TEST after all. If you've fallen off the wagon, it doesn't mean you can't get back on as many times as you want, heck I do it about 4 times a week. I am going to finish this year with a bang!

small things

I think everyone who is a part of the UBBT team has the 1000 acts of kindness as a requirement. We all know how good it feels to do an act of kindness for someone, even if that person doesn't know it was you. We all know how good it feels to be the one receiving an act of kindness, it makes you want to do something good in turn. How about an act of unkindness? What do you want to do when someone treats you badly, or cuts you off in traffic? You probably feel like round housing them to the head, or maybe a quick take down with a nice finishing reverse to the face. OK maybe that's harsh, but it doesn't make you want to do something kind for them, it makes you want to do something unkind. I feel like for every act of kindness that's paying its way forward around the world there are hundreds more acts of unkindness paying their way forward too. There is a woman who works at the deli where I shop and she is always cheerful and goes out of her way to give good service. One day there was a woman in front of me who treated her condescendingly and was very rude to her for no reason. When it was my turn the normally cheerful woman was grumpy and short with me. How many times have we done the same thing. Something happens to you that makes you mad and you snap at your kids or spouse or even friends for something you normally wouldn't. Although it will probably be hard the first few times, I encourage everyone to take every opportunity you can to repay and act of unkindness with an act of kindness. You can stop that bullet matrix style. Just say no, and pluck it out of the air and now it's lost it's power. You never know what has happened to someone, why certain things happen, but we can make the world a better place, or someones world better with such small actions.

mental organizing

I have started to write and deleted everything about 3 times now. Why is journaling so hard? If this was something I was writing privately I would vent like crazy and it would make no sense to anyone but me. I guess I am being forced to organize my thoughts when I journal publicly. I'm going to go with a list about whats floating around in my head the past few days.

1. working at an emergency vet clinic is really cool, except when there is 3 critical animals and you don't know where anything is and are therefore useless to help people do their job, which is my job.
2. I have a friend with a mental illness and he is causing a huge amount of stress in my life and I don't know what to do about it.
3. I got my worst test mark last week and even though it was an 82% I could have done better and I can't stop kicking myself about it.
4. reading this list, I realize I am focusing on the negative this week.

ok, so there are things that are done, there are things that are out of my control, and things that will get better. Breathe in, breathe out, now move forward.

veggie month

Yesterday was the beginning of my one month vegetarian challenge. So far it's been really easy, but we're only 2 days in so we'll see how it goes. I really don't anticipate too many challenges, as about half of the meals we eat are already vegetarian. I always thought that some of the meat substitutes out there sounded and looked like they were unfit for human consumption, but I was pleasantly surprised tonight when we made veggie lasagna. We decided if someone had served it to us and we didn't know that it had no meat in it we wouldn't have been able to tell. The kids said they wanted to participate fully and not eat lunch meat at school, so the whole family is in. I'll be keeping track of how I feel this month and if there are changes in energy etc. Happy eating everyone.

thats all folks

I don't know where to begin this week, I have a millions thoughts in my head, all going in different directions.
One thing I would like to do this week is make some concrete decisions about my training. I need to have a more solid plan. I think sitting down and coming up with some goals will coincide nicely with planning for UBBT 8.
I can't seem to gather my thoughts today, so thats it for this week, Cheers.

My brain is sweating

There is a lot going on, as always. Mid terms this week, lots of mental exertion! Sometimes makes you feel more tired than physical exhaustion can. I had a couple of extra days off school last week so I filled in at the barn, my replacement quit. Turns out it's hard work. I don't think I fully appreciated how much I ruined my body working there for 2+ years. After 3 days of work the injuries flared up with a vengeance. My feet are going to be a work in progress for years I think. My neck is so sore because of the tension and mis-alignment of my shoulders. My elbow joints have been aching all week. I guess I realized that when we don't take care of ourselves all along, the road to recovery can be a lot longer.
On a good note, a group of us got to help out with a Habitat for Humanity project in Stony Plain. It was a ton of fun. I may quit school and start putting up vapor barrier in the ceilings of closets for a living. It seems I may have missed my calling in life. It was a great group with a really positive vibe all day. The guys running the show were a great bunch and very patient with all of the volunteers. Thanks to Sihing Kichko for organizing the opportunity for everyone.
Have a good week everyone!

when are you going to use that anyway?

My older daughter started middle school this year, which means she is in grade five. The school is grade 5 to 9 which is a pretty big change for a small person. In my opinion this is when school can get tough. It's not all circle time and hand holding anymore.
Yesterday my daughter used kung fu to defend her cousin and herself.I don't know the details of the situation before it started. An older boy had her cousin in a bear hug and wouldn't let her go, Chantal told the boy to put her down and he wouldn't. Another boy grabbed her from behind. She took him down using the bear hug technique the kids learn at Silent River. The other boy still hadn't let go so she used a front kick to convince him. When he dropped her, Chantal said run, lets get out of here. Unfortunately, her cousin wanted to stay and finish fighting, but in the end, Chantal got her to leave. I was so thrilled to hear that she used a minimum of physical force, and that she actually knew what to do in the situation. Whenever we talk at home about defending yourself she has always worried about hurting someone,but she came through it very well. I am most proud of the fact that she tried to diffuse the confrontation with words first, and that she didn't try to stay and be hero afterwards. I think the most important things she has learned at kung fu are the ones that give her the confidence to stick up for someone and knowing she can defend herself if she needs to.

update

I did an overall numbers check yesterday and I feel pretty good about my requirements. I was telling someone the other day that I need to be accountable to someone other than myself to be consistent, well, not all the time but it helps. The UBBT has really done that for me.
I've been seeing a lot of the techniques and forms in a different way since going to the white belt class. Being taught the basics again is so much more useful than I thought it would be. There are so many nuances that I have been missing that are make or break to a defense. So next month will be the vegetarian challenge, I'm looking forward to that. See you all next week.

Today was a good day

I have never been more busy than I am these days. I have only been in school for a month now, but when I look back on the nights I had time for all of my requirements plus time for a movie it seems like a thousand years ago. My days and nights are full to the brim, mostly with new things. I have been attending the adult white/ yellow class for a couple of weeks and its a great look at where I came from, I hope that didn't sound insulting, but you do appreciate how far you've come from the beginning. The energy in the class is great as is the enthusiasm of the students. It's pretty inspiring. My brain is getting quite the workout these days as well. Sometimes the concepts are frustrating, but so far the hard work and hours hunched over the kitchen table are paying off. I am volunteering at a vet clinic to be able to apply for my program next year and its been great so far. Your supposed to do 80 hours of volunteer work because most people who drop out of the animal health program do so because they misunderstood what they would be doing. I have to say its as disgusting as I hoped it would be. I won't go into to many details but today there was a situation that involved maggots and pus... not for everyone, but I can't wait to get into it. I got to watch a couple surgeries today, one was a dog who'd been hit by a truck and had a broken back, it's truly amazing what these guys can do. I could go on and on here, but I think I'm the only one interested. So the gist of things is my life has never been so crazy, but today was a really good day.

september

I'll apologize in advance for the lame blog entry. School is going well, I have ridiculous amounts of homework every night. It is more of a challenge these days to get my requirements done, but that's life right. I had a ton of fun training on saturday and I made the white belt class last week. The kids class I help out in has grown even more and I'm finding it more challenging to keep a large groups attention. Tons of stuff to think about as always.

something new

I'm enjoying training in the kwoons new wide open space. It feels really roomy in there. Last night there was 20+ kids in the black dragons class and I felt like we had so much more room. It still feels weird not to go to the 9 am class, but I am going to try to make the white belt evening classes to get some more training hours in.
I attended the forms seminar held at the kwoon this weekend and it was everything I hoped for. I made learning Lau Gar one of my forms requirements and as it is now a requirement for black belt it was good timing. I wasn't getting far on my own so the forms seminar was a perfect opportunity. I didn't get through the whole thing, maybe just over half or so. When it was time to perform I really choked and only got through the first few moves, which was fine I guess, I still learned most of the form otherwise. Basically I had about 4 hours of undivided black belt attention (thanks Sifu Wilson) teaching me the form of my choice. Pretty sweet. So I've got a lot of new things to work on as well as keeping up with the everyday. Always busy.

i hate titles

The annual kwoon renovations were going on this week so there were no classes. I feel like I havn't been to class for a million years. You know how some days feel so long, not because they're boring, but because so much has happened. Like when something you did that morning feels like a week ago. I think it's just been a long week with all kinds of stuff going on so I feel like more time has passed than actually has.
So this week, sitting in chemistry, the professor starts talking about the scientific method, I had to actually clasp my hands together so I wouldn't raise my hand and ask him what he thought the REAL purpose of the scientific method was. That will make no sense to anyone except those of you who just finished the zen and the art requirement for Sihing class. Who knew kung fu helped you with chemistry?
I am really looking forward to returning to classes. Some days it was hard to go to classes because I was physically exhausted from work, but now I sit in a windowless classroom for 8 hours a day and the activity will be neccesary. Can't wait to train!

I can't believe it

I never forget to blog, and I did yesterday. I guess I can't say I never forget to blog now. Yesterday was my first day back to school in 12 years. Scary. Luckily I had no time to feel worried about it, I've been hauling butt completing an assignment I thought I had another month to finish for kung fu.

So I've been doing a lot of people watching the past couple of days and there are a few things I've noticed. One is that most people don't make eye contact with each other on a casual level, say just walking past someone, or when your standing in a line up. Another is that despite what people are saying a lot of times their body language is saying the opposite. There are a lot of really self conscious people out there.
I feel like martial arts has played a huge role in my self esteem over the past few years. I was about the shyest person in the world as a kid and a young adult. I spent my life having my dad tell me to speak up and look at people when I was talking to them. As a teenager at my first few jobs, co workers would tell me they thought I was really stuck up before they got to know me because I would never talk or look at anyone.
It helps that I'm 30 now ( isn't age supposed to come with wisdom?), I'm much more comfortable in my skin, and I'm a mom too, thats changed me a lot. But kung fu has really given me an awareness of myself. I see it with others at the kwoon as well. Being a martial artist makes you move differently, carry yourself differently. I wouldn't claim to be a martial 'artist' yet, but it's definitley done some great things for me.

ch ch ch changes

Lots of big changes in my life right now. I lay awake at night and think about them...its keeping me up which is frustrating. I am going back to school on Monday, Adrien starts a night shift this week,so our home life will have a totally different dynamic. I am leaving my job and I will no longer be able to attend my regular kung fu class. Today was my last day in the nine a.m. class. I don't know if I will have a regular class or if I'll have to float around and take it day to day.
It's a strange feeling. I know that good things await me in the future, it's just hard to let go of the comfortable day to day routine.
The Universe seems to have aligned for me to go to school. I have made so many contacts through my job and even random aquaintances that will help me make this come together.
I have no excuses, my success is up to me now.

What I did on my summer vacation

I'm late posting this week, we've been doing a lot of camping over the past week and a half. We spent a few days in Jasper National Park, one of the highlights was hiking on Mount Edith Cavell and seeing the Angel glacier, it's behind me on the video. I wonder if anyone else has done push ups there? I hope I was the first.

Detour

So as year two of non stop pushups continues, my shoulders, elbows and wrists hate me more and more. This morning I got out of bed early because my joints from shoulders down were aching too much to sleep. Its officially time to come up with an alternate plan for pushups.

My plan is to hold the plank position and do these sort of reverse rows with a tension band to put less stress on my joints. I will still be doing some regular pushups depending on how much pain I'm in.

The food journaling is going really well. I am more aware of what I'm eating through out the day as opposed to mindlessly snacking, as I tend to do when I'm bored. I even made myself my new favorite sandwich in my quest for more fruit and veggies. See you all next week!

food journal

So Silent Rivers UBBT team will be doing a month long food journaling project. This decision was immediately followed by two days of camping where I ate like crap to say the least. At first I thought this was a great idea,but the idea of everyone knowing my bad habits is scary. I can see the value of this project already. Since I was away and I'm not set up on the food blog yet, I'll just post what I've eaten the past two days here. Beware.

August 1st

breakfast- 3 cups coffee (cringe), 1 whole wheat english muffin and 1 cup of pineapple

snack- handful almonds and a fruit to go

lunch- whole wheat bun with ham, cheese, pickles, tomatoes

dinner- (keep in mind we threw a birthday party for adriens mom and there were people and snacks everywhere)-taco chips with nacho dip, more taco chips with fresh salsa, a couple veggies and dip, 2 grilled chicken kebabs with red pepper mushrooms and onions, salad and a piece of birthday cake with ice cream and caramel sauce, yes I'm a pig and yes it was delicious.

I limited myself to one alcoholic beverage, knowing I'd be posting, so one malibu, orange juice with 7up.

August 2nd

breakfast-granola bar, 2 cups coffee

2nd breakfast (haha) 2 pancakes, 2 sausages with maple syrup

lunch- 2 smokies and 1/2 a tomato

snacks- garden grazing ( cherry tomatoes, peas and saskatoons), a few cherries

dinner-pasta with chicken and lemon, salad with lettuce from the garden

well, that was scary, until next week!

These boots weren't made for walking

I was updating my numbers this week and I have completed one of my goals. I have walked 1000 miles or about 1600 kms so far this year. I have to say, it feels like it. My feet are killing me! I am way behind on my jui jitsu hours, maybe too far to catch up, but I am back doing at least an hour every week now that all my related injuries are healed. Pushups are my nemesis right now. I fall behind because my shoulders and elbows need a break and then I need to catch up. I'm sure a lot of people are experiencing the same thing as time goes on. It's injury vs. requirements.

My oldest daughter is 9 and she has been participating in the daytime kung fu class I normally attend when they are in school. She has really impressed me with her spirit. Last week the class did timed kicks, something she has never done. The next day she gets out of bed and says her legs hurt, she doesn't know why... I wanted to take a picture and put it in her baby book. First workout to ever make you sore the next day. It was great because now she'll be a little more sympathetic when Adrien and I are hobbling around the house as we do so often. I think it was also the first time she felt a real bond with her class mates after training. It's very cool to see her step up and push herself. If only I'd started martial arts at 4!

me- this week

Tied up some loose ends this week, that always feels good. I've had the chance to train quite a bit too. It's amazing when you work on just one thing how it evolves, and this is over maybe half an hour. We've been talking about having an eye for detail and I'm trying to develop mine. I was practicing forms and I realized how much I zone out when I do them instead of thinking of what I'm doing. It's a work in progress.

There have been moments over the past months when I'm at the kwoon and I'm sprawled on the floor after a set of pushups or situps or just talking with someone after a class and I realize I'm almost as comfortable there as I am at home. There is definitely still the respect there for the kwoon and the instructors as well as the etiquette, but it's really my home away from home. I tried to imagine not being in kung fu and I really just couldn't. I couldn't even imagine who I would be without it.

I was talking to a co worker about the boot camp experience and she asked my why anyone would put themselves through that. There is no way to explain to someone who has never had to struggle through something or to push themselves to their limit and then beyond, how you come out the other side a changed person. A better person. I think that is what joining kung fu has done for me. I've gone way beyond what I ever thought I could possibly do physically and in turn I've realized I can go places I never thought in life as well.

Progressing wisely

July has been a pretty good month so far, I'm still not caught up on my numbers, but I'm working on it. Although I am down to 2 days a week at work I am noticing all of my repetitive stress injuries a lot more. I don't know if it's because they have a few days to actually start healing and then the next day I go to work everything gets undone? Last Tuesday before San Shou class started Sifu Freitag was walking around doing the same arm/shoulder stretch thing that I always do for my shoulder pain. I asked her what was up with her shoulder and she said tendonitis. I haven't gone and gotten an actual diagnosis but it seems likely that the pain I'm having in both shoulders is tendonitis or bursitis. I know I have inflamed tendons in my hand which is causing the sticking when I flex my fingers and I know I have plantar fasciitis in my feet... the tendons separating from the bone. There seems to be trend here. Right now I feel like my biggest problem is not knowing when it's smart to rest and when I should be pushing through and training. I want to get better but I almost feel embarrassed sitting on the bench watching class instead of participating. Most of the people I know who have been training for more than a couple of years have chronic injuries, it's nothing new for someone in the martial arts. Why is it so hard to progress wisely?

the black belt success cycle

Over the past few weeks there has been something bugging me, something besides the overuse of LOL everywhere. The general lack of effort that most people put into everything they do drives me absolutely bonkers. I can tolerate a lot from kids and co workers and friends, but people that don't care to put any time or thought into anything besides there appearance is the limit for me. When I'm around people like that I feel like there is a void I'm being sucked into, I feel like I'm trying to walk through mud.

Sadly it's these people that always complain about their bad luck and how there are so many obstacles in the way of them and their goals. These are the people that are always looking for the secret to success, or the easy way to get something.

Last week in Sihing class we talked about the black belt success cycle- Have a goal, make a plan and get a success coach, TAKE CONSISTENT ACTION, review your progress, and review your goal. Obviously,(or maybe not so obviously) this can be applied to any area of your life. I think it's easy for most of us to have goal and maybe even make a plan, but it's the consistent action part that's so hard.

Just like pushups the more I take consistent action in my life the easier it gets. I've figured out the secret! Too bad most people will be disappointed to know it involves a lot of hard work.

boot camp 2010

I went to boot camp again this year. I read my journal entry after last years boot camp and it was cool to read my thoughts, there was a lot I forgot about. Last year I was sick for 2 months before and getting through that day was a real struggle for me. This year was a struggle too, but just in the good kind of way. Part of the day is the fitness test, which everyone dreads. It's the end of the day and it's tough. One of the things we do is timed kicks, front thrust, side heel, roundhouse, spinning back kick. One minute on each leg for each kick, so 8 minutes total. I find this excruciating. When we do this in class I almost always want to throw up. It's funny but at boot camp it's not like that. I don't know if it's the energy of all the people in there that keeps you going, or the do or die attitude, but its something special. There is a bond when you sweat and bleed and get sick on each other. I'm sure most of us have felt this with our training partners out there. I think the best part of the day is getting to the other side of it with everyone, having that shared experience, knowing everyone else there is just as exhausted as you...that they really get it. The camaraderie is pretty special. Here's to everyone that's still as sore as I am after the weekend!

summer slowdown

So summer is officially here and I've been feeling the strain of keeping up with my requirements already. I think that the big difference for me this year will be having the phys out program telling me how many reps I need to do to catch up and my daily and weekly numbers to keep up. Last summer I kind of put my head in the sand and didn't look at my running total which made it almost impossible to catch up. I plan on this summer being different than the last.

I'm still fighting this cough that has been following me around. My cardio is suffering because of it but I'm hoping it will go away soon.

Silent River is having it's annual boot camp this Saturday so I'm gearing myself up for that. I went last year in not the best health, but got through the day and had a really positive experience. The agenda looks like it's going to be a great day. I'm hoping my lungs will co operate and I'll make it through that run at the end of the day.

month 6

Training this week has still been a little slow. I have this lingering cough that likes me so much it won't leave. This morning I had a really good class and sweat a lot and all that good stuff. I feel like I havn't been able to fully participate in class for awhile, so it was much needed. I think I'm good to go back to the San Shou class, my attendance has been pretty abysmal the past couple of months. I would love to recruit some other women for the class, but no one is interested. I don't mind sparring the guys, but in a traditional san shou or grappling match, it would be great to have someone my size to work with. We are almost halfway through UBBT 7 and I am in better shape numbers wise than I was last year so I feel good about that. Going to try to make the second

half better than the first.

1 step forward, 2 steps back

Last week I caught up on numbers with all of my goals except one and I was feeling pretty good about it. This week I got knocked flat by a virus and I have done almost nothing. I have been spending my nights awake coughing up a lung and my days feeling dragged out from the nights. So I'm playing catch up this week again, I am hoping that I can regain some ground and that I will actually get to sleep tonight.

Good Karma

I normally don't work Mondays but someone quit last week and I got called in. I like my Mondays so it was kind of a bummer, but good things happened! A woman who boards her horse at the barn owns the 24 hour vet clinics in Edmonton and said I could do my 80 hours of work at her clinics... hurray! Thats out of the way. She also told me the head of the Animal Health Program is a trainer who works with some of the boarders and their horses, so I hope that can work to my benefit as well. But now I'm tired and it's early to work tomorrow. Cheers!

It's the first day of kindergarten

I got promoted to Sihing a few weeks ago and I was really excited to go to the Sihing class on Friday nights.Everyone always said it was a really great class, and it is. I think the biggest thing it has done for me is make me realize how much I don't know. I feel like a white belt again. I'm clumsy, I have no flow, my body won't follow the instructions my brain is giving it. Despite those things it's exciting. I know I will get better and I like the idea of being able to wrap my brain around some of the concepts we learn and be able to translate them into my techniques, combinations etc. Cheers until next week.

It's official

I finally got my confirmation from NAIT last week, I'm officially headed back to school in September! I had decided not to say anything at work until I had my letter in hand. I've really been dreading quitting, since I am one of four employees. When I told my boss I said we had the whole summer to find a replacement for me, she said that no one could replace me. So that was pretty cool. What does this have to do with kung fu? Since I started UBBT 6 and continued on with 7, I have been consciously trying to do a better job on everything that I do, going out of my way to do things for others or to make sure that the job is done well, even though working in a barn doesn't require any special talents or skill. I have officially gone "out of the kwoon and into the world." I guess sometimes you don't realize that the baby steps you've taken have brought you so far. I like the fact that I will be remembered for my hard work.

Right Now

Last year at this time I was sick. My birthday and mothers day were days spent curled up in bed feeling terrible. It continued for months and I eventually got over whatever it was. I still don't know what it was, I remember all the different tests I had done and the time spent in the hospital and doctors offices. This weekend I was thinking of it and I started sweating, my heart raced and I got dizzy. I had a little anxiety attack just from the memory of how frustrating those months were.

So tonight while I did forms in the backyard I thought about how good it feels to be healthy and well. I felt my breath and my body work together and I felt happy to be where I am.

Tiger Challenge

Silent River's Tiger Challenge was on Saturday, and as always it was a great event. I only participated in one event this year since I'm letting myself heal up, but I got a chance to help out more with score keeping etc. Both of my daughters are in kung fu and they were really excited about the tournament. My youngest daughter is 7 and she's a little firecracker. We always talk to the kids about how winning isn't the point of competing etc etc, and they always nod their heads and agree and say "we know mommy". But Teagan really likes winning, so she just says these things to make me happy, since she hasn't ever lost anything. So this year Teagan is in a group that has a bit of a wider range of ages and maybe she didn't practice as much as she could have. She went through all four of her events and didn't place. She held up pretty well and had good sportsmanship, but when I asked her if she was ok there were some tears. Every kid gets a participation medal, but she felt the loss of those gold medals of previous years. By the end of the day she had totally forgotten about not winning her events and told us what a fun time she had. There were so many people that told her what a good job she did and were a positive influence on her. She got to run around and play with a group of kids from the club after the kids events were over. The great community and positive atmosphere of Silent River made that day awesome for her, once again I am grateful to be a part of a club that promotes such a healthy outlook for it's big and little members.

It's just a dummy, dummy

Today is my last day off and sometimes I almost don't enjoy the day off knowing that tomorrow it's back to the same old same old. But today Adrien and I went shopping for dummy materials. Adrien wanted to make a grappling dummy to practice techniques on. It was actually kind of fun and it took about an hour to make a somewhat lifelike practice dummy. As soon as the kids walked in the door from school they pounced on the thing.... I almost feel bad for this inanimate object. Half the time they want to pretend it's a prince or their future husband and the other half they're kicking him in the head and doing body slams on him. What a life. I feel a little sorry for myself too. I walked into the computer room to blog and my heart jumped into my throat because the stupid thing is sitting in the computer chair with it's bag glove hands on the keyboard "typing". Adrien just killed himself laughing and says he's been sitting there with butterflies in his stomach waiting for me to go in there and have a heart attack. He's having way too much fun with this thing! Cheers till next week.

Unexpected hiatus

So I am taking a break from sparring for awhile. I did something gnarly to my leg in San Shou and I guess I've finally realized I need to let myself recover. It's so easy to tell someone else that there is no shame in taking time to heal and not to worry about what other people think when you can't do everything that the class is doing or to train as hard as everyone else. It is so darn hard to take my own advice it's literally painful. I had high hopes to spar in the upcoming tournament. I love sparring, and I work hard at it but I just don't know if I'll be ok by then. I always have the idea that I'll go and just take it easy, but that never happens. I feel like a horse, chafing at the bit, I just want to go but I can't.

Most boring post ever, no really.

As always, I have been sitting here trying to think of what to blog about and I still haven't come up with anything, so I'm going to talk about my feet. Feel free to stop reading now, I won't be offended.
The sad condition of my feet has further deteriorated over the past two or three weeks, culminating in me roundhouse kicking the plastic base of the heavy bag with a good amount of force last week. I should add that I didn't do this on purpose, in case you were wondering. Of course I was kicking with the top of my foot in order to save my injured toes and ball of foot. So my entire foot is now a mess. I am pretty sure I have plantar fasciitis in both feet, so I'm wearing my runners to work instead of steel toe boots. Hopefully that won't backfire and the title of next weeks blog won't be I got stepped on by a 1300 pound horse. I finally broke down and bought some martial art type shoes to wear while I'm training. They seem OK, except I have a tendency to trip while walking on the mats. I'm sure in time this will be funny to me and not just other people. So here's hoping the shoes help, and I apologize for such a lengthy blog about my feet.

The old weight on your shoulders

So it's the beginning of the fourth month into 7. It has become a way of life for my whole family. I was walking to the park with my kids and my older daughter spotted litter on the side of the alley and without missing a beat grabbed it and threw it in the trash. I know this is because she sees me doing this and it's nice to see such concrete evidence that they learn from what they see us doing.

In the past few weeks I have realized that I tend to hang onto negative thoughts or things that happen throughout the day. For example, I was at a store and there was a woman on a cell phone trying to get her shopping cart through a door with her kids in it, the door was slamming shut on her cart so I ran over and held it for her. She in no way acknowledged me and I thought to myself that that was kind of rude. Then I told my sister about it and we ended up talking about rude people. It ended up being quite the discussion about all the people that do things like that and how horrible they are. I don't want to be the person who's always whining about the people who don't say thank you etc. Negativity breeds negativity.
My kids had a book from the library with a bunch of short stories in them. One was about an old monk and a young monk walking in a busy town. A young lady dressed in her best and carrying many shopping bags runs into a large mud puddle. The old monk runs over, puts her on his back and carries her over the mud. She sticks her nose in the air and walks away with no word of thanks. The old monk and the young monk finish their business and continue walking. Young monk is fuming at the behavior of the young lady and finally says, aren't you angry that she treated you that way after what you did for her? Old monk says I put her down hours ago, why are you still carrying her?
So here's to putting down the things that I don't need to hang onto anymore. Cheers.

The big stuff and the little stuff

I was in a big slump last week and I finally made a really big decision that I have hummed and hawed over for a long time now. I'm going back to school. This will be a big change for me and my family. I won't be working and my kids might have to be in early morning child care. It's kind of scary but in an exciting, top of the roller coaster kind of way. I am happy with this decision, and I feel good that I am working towards a career for myself.

The forms marathon was good, I did 99 forms in my 2 odd hours at the kwoon. My knees are really feeling it today. It was cool to be a link in that unbroken chain of forms. This reaffirms that it really doesn't take long to get in 5 forms a day.

We grappled in San Shou this week. We learned a mount escape and then our challenge was who could reverse positions fastest. I worked with Mr. Krebs and also fought him for my challenge. He got out of my mount in 15 seconds which kind of bummed me out, I figured there was no way I'd beat that. So on the bottom I couldn't pull off the mount escape we learned, but then for the first time I actually remembered something WHILE I was rolling and thought, hey, he's all tied up here so I trapped and rolled... and there it was 13 seconds! So in a very unsportsmanlike manner I jumped up with a big yahoo and my arms in the air, after which I apologized to Mr. Krebs for doing so. It was awesome to actually pull something off. So what if it's the first thing you learn grappling! So until next week, cheers.

I'm glad I went

It's been a catch up week for me, my numbers aren't 100% caught up from vacation but I'm getting there.
I have missed a lot of my san shou class in the past month and a half. I hate to admit but doing traditional san shou with a bunch of guys took it's toll on me and I took a class off. I was gone for two weeks and last week I finally went to class. I had a terrible day, I was so sore and I didn't want to be there. I've never had a bad class but this one was exactly what I needed. Lots of sparring drills with a partner to get warmed up before our matches. My partner made me laugh and I felt looser than I had in a long time. I guess if you don't fight it sounds weird to say how relaxing it can be to punch and kick someone and especially to take those hits too. Getting a little banged up was just what the doctor ordered.

The honeymoons over

So it's back to business as usual after having a week off of kung fu and 2 weeks off work. What a vacation! The time off was good, now that the old aches and pains are coming back I can see where they are originating. Good in a weird kind of way I guess. I had my first physio appointment today. I'm pretty stoked I actually made the appointment and got there after thinking of doing it for so long. I may have overwhelmed her with everything I want fixed though, it was kind of funny, at one point she ran out of paper. Maybe I just talk too much.
So I've noticed the "honeymoon" is over for a lot of people in regards to the UBBT. We are past the point where the excitement of starting isn't a big motivator anymore. Now we are starting the uphill climb. I'm feeling it myself, especially after taking a week off. At the beginning you couldn't read the blogs fast enough, there were so many. This is the part where I tell myself how happy I'll be when I look back and see how far I've come. I don't think anyone who puts that much time and effort into training and being a better person for a whole year can look back and think, huh maybe I should have just stayed where I was.

Warm places

So I'm headed to Mexico tomorrow morning and I'm trying to cram in as many requirements as I can tonight. I think because so often I am going for numbers I have let some of my technique slip a little. Someone brought it to my attention and I've been thinking about it ever since. If I get 5 reps of kempo in and they suck then what was the point? Because I know I will be practicing this doesn't fall under the "practicing wrong is better than no practice at all" category. So I'm back to the basics once again, I seem to be ending up there a lot My mantra right now is mindful practice! I'll be blogging late next week, see you all then!

I can't think of a catchy title

Silent Rivers Chinese New Year banquet was amazing as always. There always seems to be a resurgence of energy in the students after seeing the new black belts show us what they're made of. It's definitely something to aspire to. It was different to be backstage with the kids this year, I didn't sit and watch my kids perform as I usually do. I have so much respect for the kids instructors, anyone who can organize and wrangle that many kids with any semblance of order and without losing their cool is amazing in my books. It was fun to be in one of the lions to pick up the red packets, well, except when kids want to touch the lion and your sitting there bent over in the back of the lion... well, you can imagine. All in all an awesome night.

This has nothing to do with what I've been writing about but these are my random thoughts from the week. For a few different reasons death has been on my mind, not in a morbid way, just in the how it's a part of life kind of way. One thing is clear,the little things do make a difference a life well lived can leave a legacy that will be passed on long after we're gone.

ROAR!

We've had some really nice weather the past week and it seems like everyone is in a good mood because of it. There is just something about feeling the sun on your face... without freezing winds accompanying, that makes you feel good. I had the opportunity to help out today at a family day winter carnival of sorts. It was more fun than I thought it would be, there were lots of cute kids and happy families. My own kids came and helped out with a few games of snowball toss, it was fun.

On another note, we rang in the Chinese New Year with another 1000 push ups and sit ups. My muscles don't feel it very much the next day like they used to. This was the hardest 1000 I've ever done in regards to my wrist joints though. I am uncertain what to do with the ever worsening wrist/hand situation that I have going on. Right now there is a lot of waiting and I feel like I'm chomping at the bit for a solution. Of course if I'd have gone to the doctor sooner, my six week wait would already be over. Lesson learned I guess. Take care of yourself and your injuries! Happy Year of the Tiger everyone!

The title is the worst part

After blogging weekly for over a year, it is still one of the hardest things for me to do. I always sit here and stare at the screen and end up catalogueing my injuries as a blog entry. Exciting!
So just an update then I guess. Just about everything is on track right now and what I'm behind on is going to be caught up by the end of the week. It feels good. Some of the students are planning on doing another 1000 push ups and sit ups day on Chinese New Year so it will be nice to beef up those totals before I head to Mexico next month. I have someone new to work on jui jitsu with thats my size. It's pretty great, my ribs and sternum are happy about it. I suppose practicing with someone almost twice your size is like running with ankle and wrist weights on, when they're off your light as a feather! So here's to another productive week. Cheers.

One down, 11 to go

Not much to say this week, I caught up a few of my numbers to finish January strong. The physout program that Adrien put out there for everyone has made all the difference.
There have been a few times this month where I've seen things happen that left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Just strangers at the grocery store or where ever. It still blows me away that someone can knock down a stack of something and just walk away from it even though there are people behind that can't get around it. Or people that litter... I just think, really? really? you honestly don't care? There are a lot of indifferent people out there, sometimes I forget, being around so many people that are actively trying to make a difference in the world. I know most people that see you fixing or picking up something that someone else made a mess of are surprised. Most of them stare for a minute and say in a kind of disbelieving voice, that was really nice. I hope all those people that are out there doing their acts of kindness everyday influence at least one or two people over the course of the year to do the same. You never know who's watching you or that you may have inspired them to be a better person. I think this is one of the most important things we do in the UBBT and life.

Normal? I forgot what that feels like

So I thought that this being my second UBBT that I would miss out on the wonderful seasoning process of burning muscles long unused and the accompanying aches and pains. This year seems to be starting out as the culmination to many small injuries compounding and turning into bigger injuries. This week I really realized how "out" I am. My upper back and shoulders haven't been right since I don't know when. There is a spot on my back that feels like there is a knife in it, in the sense that there is no relief or stretch that makes it feel better. My hands fall asleep before I shovel down the length of my walk, before I even get to the actual sidewalk. Last Tuesday seemed to be the last straw for my big toe. We grappled in San Shou class, which is the worst possible thing it seems for my sad little toe. The joint is so painful that I'm having trouble doing kicks and being in proper stances. I'm doing my push ups on one foot. Tape is no longer the answer. I know that one can expect to have aches and pains, bruises and whatnot being in martial arts, but there are some things that can be fixed. So, I am making next week the week to make appointments and figure out what the heck I can do to fix myself up, because as I have realized, although this has become normal for me, it shouldn't be. Despite my complaining it has been another great week, I find having my numbers on the computer and knowing others can see them really keeps me motivated at the end of a long day.

week 3

My sister got married this weekend, all the preparation, driving and late nights really caught up with me. I had my nephew and their two dogs at my place too which really adds to the craziness. This morning after I got the kids on the bus I laid down and slept through my morning class. I realized at work that I had signed up to do warm up today too. It was embarrassing to see Sifu tonight and tell her that I slept through it. On the bright side I think I've caught up on my sleep.

So we have started a new semester in the San Shou class and it seems that I am the only woman in the class now. I don't mind working with guys at all, in fact I think in some ways it's an advantage to have a bigger person to work with. My husband is my partner for all the extra training that I do and I feel comfortable working closely with guys, but it doesn't always go both ways. A lot of times I am hopelessly out weighed and I suppose if I was skilled enough that wouldn't always be the deciding factor in my matches as far as grappling and traditional san shou goes but for now it is. I know that a lot of the guys in the class like to train a little harder and that can be tough when your worried about hurting your partner. I would love to say that I can take as much as any guy in the class can, but I can't. Adrien has almost crushed my ribs a few times practicing moves... I just can't support the weight of someone almost twice my size. I would love to recruit some women for the class, but there aren't many that are interested. So I guess this means I just have to get really good. My biggest problem is remembering what I've learned while I'm rolling. Practice, practice, practice!

Keep on keepin' on

So it's been a great first week of 7. It's refreshing to have new goals to work on, not that I don't love doing kempo one two and three, but I was glad to be done that requirement! I like filling out the days blank spaces in my notebook with push ups, sit ups and the like, it feels good to have some physical evidence of progress made. Sometimes that makes a crazy day seem more worthwhile.

In the kids warm up tonight I did push ups and sit ups like I was flying off the ground, it felt pretty great. I love the days that you really notice all the hard work that you put in. I would love the kids that I help out with felt as fired up about kung fu as I do. I know some kids catch the enthusiasm and some don't seem to care no matter what you do. Its so awesome to see the ones that have the fire lit under them, or when you have a really high energy class. Those kids can really vibrate the walls when they want to.

Next week I will post my requirements, I can never seem to get the list and my blog together at the same time. Till next week!

GO!

Wow, it's 2010 and the beginning of UBBT 7. Started the new year off with 1000 push ups and 1000 sit ups, feels pretty awesome. It's a great start and makes me wonder why I have trouble getting in 150 some days.
It feels good to be starting a new set of requirements and have new goals to be working towards. I was a stay at home mom when I started UBBT 6 but I'm back working so 7 will have a totally different dynamic for me. I have to be smarter with my training and fitting my daily goals in where I can. I have been taking a pedometer to work with me and realized that I had been shortchanging myself with my kms. I had estimated that I walked about 4-5 kms a day depending on when I started. Turns out it's more like 15 or 16 kms just while I'm at work, pretty cool.
I've taken on less push ups this year and I will be adding in an equal number of rowing exercises to try and repair some of the damage I've done over the last year by strengthening one sided.
So, it's another year of aches and pains, bruises, and injuries but I'm proud of them because I know my teammates are just as tired and bruised and battered and we work hard to get there. yeah, it's going to be an awesome year.